That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Randomize
