he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
porn star boner night. come get it.
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
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