My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
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