I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
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