if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
I think we might need a safe word for this...
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
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