i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
i just fell asleep masturbating. I'm no longer surprised i'm single. I can't even pleasure myself.
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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