oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
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