I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
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