I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
should my penis look like a turkey
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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