If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
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