Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
Sometimes while peeing I'll go hands free, put my arms up by my chest and make claw hands, and pretend I'm a new type of dinosaur called Dickosaurus Rex.
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
Randomize
