In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
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