I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
How does one acquire holy water?
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
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