if any two of us come back from the bar and aren't getting laid we will systematically destroy everything in the kitchen
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
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