pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
You were so drunk that you didn't even notice when I switched out your shot of jäger for a shot of maple syrup...before or after you drank it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
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