Well douche your snatch and let's go!
I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
He better not be in your backpack
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
Randomize
