idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
Randomize
