if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
Randomize
