Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
Randomize
