i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Randomize
