I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
