Three words: puerto rican gang bang
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
You can't just leave with hair like that
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
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