I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
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