Porn is love you can see.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Randomize
