But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
God gave him joint rollers for hands
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
