lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
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He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
Her roommate texted her and told her that her cat died. Now she's double-fisting bottles of wine while howling and wailing her dead cat's name. Not how I pictured this booty call.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
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Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
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