She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
Randomize
