I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
She even gives head with a lisp.
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
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