i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
Come see our sink grown plant.
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
Randomize
