i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
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