You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
Sometimes while peeing I'll go hands free, put my arms up by my chest and make claw hands, and pretend I'm a new type of dinosaur called Dickosaurus Rex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
You spent an hour sitting naked in your neighbor's Jeep Wrangler yelling in a terrible British accent about how you were "on a safari". Then you passed out on your lawn.
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
Randomize