Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
I haven't been this sober since birth.
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
Lack of response to this text gains you a half hour of freedom before I initiate operations to conclude you are not, in fact, comatose. You requested no mercy.
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
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