that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
at one point last night, you were literally auctioning me off. "reeeally drunk hot girl ! we'll start the bidding at an ice cold corona. oh, we have a bidder! do i hear a shot of whiskey? going once, going twice.."
youre welcome
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
We were drunk waiting for tacos and I gave him a handy in the back of the Uber while giving the driver relationship advice. I think I'm handling the whole grad school thing alright.
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Randomize
