I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
Also a shrinking boner emoji would be helpful
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
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