JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Randomize
