meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
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