i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
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She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
What's grosser: using a dirty sex towel as an oven mitt? or using the oven to reheat superbowl bean dip for dinner?
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
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He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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