He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
Randomize
