I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
Randomize
