did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
Randomize
