so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
Just got hit on by a 28-year old, quadraplegic, triple-cancer-survivor redneck. Now updating bucket list to meet newfound standards.
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
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