her vagine was all disorganized.
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
Randomize
