i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
he told me I talked like a deaf person
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
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