I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
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