His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
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