i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?