I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
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