Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
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