We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
Randomize
