You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize