its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize