He is such a slut. More and more my type.
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
Edward fifth and chaser hands
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
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